They, who noticed

I miss the times when I have troubles and confused, and I will text someone, and that someone will tell me "Don't worry, everything will be alright." 

Naalala ko tuloy bigla ang professor namin sa Group Dynamics, si Sir Art. When everyone thinks I'm okay and they are believing that fake smile I am projecting, he called my attention and ask me "What's wrong Hija? You seemed not to be in your normal you." 

Also, one time, when I was so frustrated, I just cried in the corner, near the Dean's Ofc of our school, I don't care whether students will see me crying. And I don't bother to look at those person who are looking at me, after, I received a text message. "Ate, what's wrong, bakit ka umiiyak, ok ka na ba?" A text message from Abe, a fourth year BS Psych, who happened to be my group mate in Genetics. 

:( May mga times na kung pinaka hindi mo ini-expect na tao, sila pa yung makaka-notice ng real emotions mo.

Lullabies And Good Nights

Lullaby, and good night, in the skies stars are bright

May the moon, silvery beams, bring you sweet dreams

Close you eyes, now and rest, may these hours be blessed

Till the sky's bright with dawn, when you wake with a yawn

Lullaby, and good night, you are mother's delight

I'll protect you from harm, and you'll wake in my arms

Sleepyhead, close your eyes, for I'm right beside you

Guardian angels are near, so sleep without fear

Lullaby, and good night, with roses bedight

Lilies o'er head, lay thee down in thy bed

Lullaby, and good night, you are mother's delight

I'll protect you from harm, and you'll wake in my arms

Lullaby, and sleep tight, my darling sleeping

On sheets white as cream, with the head full of dreams

Sleepyhead, close your eyes, I'm right beside you

Lay thee down now and rest, may you slumble the best

Go to sleep, little one, think of puppies and kittens.

Go to sleep, little one, think of butterflies in spring.

Go to sleep, little one, think of sunny bright mornings.

Hush, darling one, sleep through the night

Sleep through the night

Sleep through the night

source:  http://www.lyricsera.com/597443-lyrics-brahms-lullaby.html

My Angel In Disguised

that scary moment when you've thought you lost 1k! panic mode at its highest level. but instead, you found an angel in disguised. extending an effort just to make things ok. it's not actually holding another 1k in your hands that makes you calm, its his presence. his company. his support when that scary moment happened. seeing him going for an extra mile of help made me think and say "I'm such a lucky person, I have him in my life, and he is my friend." 

more often that not, God really works differently!

thank you so much Leo, di ko alam ang nangyari sakin kanina kung wala ka. I Love You Leo!

My Twin by Fate

"Hi I'm Jen, and you?" That's how our friendship begun. And the rest is history.

Second semester ng 2010, kababalik lang naming dalawa mula sa paghinto sa schooling. Parehas kaming galing mula sa naglapsed na contract sa trabaho. Same reason, it's so tiring ang mag-apply nang mag-apply at pagkatapos ay mae-end of contract, kaya we decided to go back again sa school, at pag graduate, hopefully makahanap ng permanent job na magbibigay daan para makamit ang mga hinahangad at matiwasay na estado sa buhay.

Sa una, simpleng kaklase. Seatmate, companion. As time goesby, textmate, friend, we became so close, became twin. Ang activities nya alam ko, ang lakad ko alam nya. Hanggang sa ang kinakainisan ko, kinakainisan din nya. Ang gusto ko gusto nya na din. We also have similarities in terms of our outlook in life. Preference sa buhay. Actors and actress na gusto. Same movie, lalong lalo na ang Armageddon. We both love ice cream. We almost have the perfect friendship I could say. Ang isa sa masasabi kong "big deal" ng buhay ko ay alam nya, sa part naman nya, I believe, kapag magkasama kami humihinto ang oras. I still remember during Statistics days namin, class dismiss at around 6 pm, pero what we are doing actually is extending our time together. Kakain ng street foods sa paligid ng campus while she is having a "drama", nevertheless, ang mga hapon na yun ang isa sa mga pinaka-special sa relasyon namin as friends.

We have a lot of endeavors na naovercome, especially sa side nya. Mga pangyayari na I know somehow kahit pano made her a better person, a more wiser woman in terms of choices in life.

As time and days passes by, nadagdagan kami ng kaibigan, actually we became family pa nga. We don't call our group as barkada, because we believe, we are more than that. We're  not just a simple barkada, we are more of a family. we find each other as our comfort zone. 

Pero gaya ng isang simpleng pamilya, dumadaan lahat sa pagsubok. There is a certain issue sa school na nagtrigger ng conflict between the two of us. Isang project resulted into misunderstanding.It was actually the MOST painful day in my college life. Nainvolved ang ibang tao. Nakarinig kami mula sa isa't -isa ng mga salitang nakasakit samin parehas. Kung dati-rati ang isang simpleng tampuhan ay napapalampas lang ng hindi pagkikibuan, a day or two, we are okay. Pero not that time. Masyado masakit para sa aming dalawa ang mga nangyari during those moments. So painful na we don't wanna see each other. Pero mahirap, kasi we actually have the same circle of friends. Sa ayaw at sa gusto naming dalawa konektado kami sa isa't-isa.

Its been a year actually, everytime I remember that event, wala na akong pain na nararamdaman. Sa totoo pa nga, I wish her well. I pray to God every night na sana yung nangyari sa kanya made her a better person. At sana din it brought her lesson na somehow molded her as an empowered woman. As for me, okay na ko. If time permits, kung magkakaayos man kami, I don't know, as I always say, I'll just cross the bridge when I get there. After all, she used to be my twin by fate, Jenny.

 

(Me & Jenny, eating our comfort food)

Great!

This guy is such a great one! Because of his video, I am much more eager to learn how to play the song in guitar, and flute, and maybe in violin, soon. . . . . 


Hope I could be like him someday. Hits the notes so clean. Keep it up!

Missing The Old You

Sometimes you miss a person not because you are far from each other. Its because you miss the same old person in him/her, you miss the old things you do together, the conversation no one could actually understand, only the two of you. And sad to say, sometimes that person is actually just around you. Sad to say, he/she doesn't notice the changes happened. 

I miss my old friend, I miss the stuffs we used to do together. I miss everything, I just miss my friend. I miss the friend I used to know.

I miss home.

Nakakamiss magpahinga.
Nakakamiss ang bahay namin.
Nakakamiss ko ang upuan ko.
Nakakamiss ang steady trip ko.
Nakakamiss ang buong bahay namin.
Nakakamiss ang tulog na 12 hours.
Nakakamiss ang magluto.
Nakakamiss ang magtimpla ng juice at ipalamig sa ref.
Nakakamiss ang manuod ng tv.
Nakakamiss ang soundtriping ko.
Nakakamiss ang magstay sa labas ng bahay at tignan ang mga halaman.
Nakakamiss ang makipag-usap sa alaga kong pusa.
Nakakamiss ang lahat ng ginagawa ko dito sa bahay.
Nakakamiss ang family ko.
Nakakamiss lahat.

Totoong at the end of the day, despite the happiness and lovely people outside the house, THERE IS NO PLACE LIKE HOME.

I just miss home. I miss being home.
:(

I Know Now How It Feels

Dear God,

I know now exactly how it feels, when people are telling you "I have faith in you" yet at the back of their mind there is a doubt in what you can do for them. I am not You who can make all things possible, but I can feel if a person who tells me "I rely to you" is not that confident in me, in what I can be able to do. And yes You see what's inside our heart, read what's our our mind, so true that it feels bad how can someone pray to You and tell You that he is depending on You, yet in doubt. I feel the same way. Really, it matters, if someone should rely, then rely with all his faith.

Lesson learned Lord. :)

Still A Baby at 29th :)

After consuming my half day at the library with my group mates, my mother texted me and ask me to go home by 4pm. "Aalis si Dan uwi ka ng 4". So, ang mabait na youngest child na ayaw bigyan ng sama ng loob ang napakasupportive na mother at the same time my number 1 critic, :D since library will close at around 4pm, I decided to went home. I thought she asked me to be home immediately because may mga magrerent, well actually, its the case naman talaga. Its just, parang may something pa. The moment I entered the house, she immediately told me "May puto pa sa ref, kainin mo na, masarap". And so after I changed my clothes, she gave me the "puto". Di pa ko tapos kumain, she gave me another meryenda. "Kainin mo na 'tong tinapay dito, sayo na yan, ipalaman mo yung Spam". :D And while eating she told me, "nagluluto na ko ng hapunan, para mamaya makakain na rin tayo, may sabaw yun, nilaga." Para tuloy gusto kong itanong na, kaya nyo ba ko pinauwi para pakainin ng pakainin? Then after I have finished eating all the food she gave me, she gave me ripe banana and a glass of water.


It took me sometime to realized, last day nga pala, I told her na lage ako nalilipasan ng gutom lately, making me lose some weight, and this is due to our thesis. Last time nga pala nung nag-uusap kami, she told me, "wag kang magpagutom, kasi wala ka lalo maiisip na maganda kapag gutom ka. bakit mo titipirin sarili mo, may pera ka naman."


I just realized, at the age of 29, my mother still take care of me as her baby. Ako parin ang nag-iisa nyang little girl. Her youngest, her unica hija. Still baby at 29th. :) I have the best mother on earth! Thank you GOD for giving her to me, kahit pa nga, madalas kaming magtalo sa mga decisions in life, I know I'm kinda stubborn at times. But then again, I'm still thankful, though she is my number one critic, my number one enemy, she is the reason why I want to be successful. I want to prove her something, something different. At alam mo yun GOD kung ano yun. ;)

Thesis It!

Tomorrow, we will execute the procedure of our thesis. This is it. This is the moment my group and I were waiting for, to finally gather the data needed so that we can move on to the next phase. We know better that we are tracking the right track, but I am very much concern on how are we going to execute the procedure. I am hoping that we will make it perfectly and exclusively based only on what stated on our Gathering data Procedure.

God be with our group. Eto na po yun, sana po kayo na bahala. Maexecute po sana namin ng tama.

thoughts for the day

Darating ang time na mapapansin mo na lang na wala ka nang nararamdaman para sa isang tao na naging part ng buhay mo. Regardless of what kind of relationship you have had with that person. And when that time comes, mapapangiti ka na lang. Babalikan mo ang mga araw na pinagsamahan nyo, masasayang alaala na mapapangiti ka, kasama na din ang mga negative part. Pwedeng manariwa ang isang sugat, pwede rin naman maghilom. May mga bagay kang ginawa na nakakapagsisi, meron din namang paninindigan mo. Hindi dahil sa pride kundi alam mong TAMA ang naging desisyon mo. At the end of the day, anumang kinahinatnan ng iyong relasyon sa kanya, sa kanino mang tao, anong uri man ng relasyon ang namagitan sa inyo, may mga bagay na hindi na maibabalik, mga masasakit na salitang nabitawan, mga reactions na hindi naiwasan, kahit ano pa man yan, dapat mayron kang natutunan. Dahil ang buhay ay isang paglalakbay!

Benefited from Habagat

I have learned my lesson once again. The reason why I'm applying CHANGE. Nakakatawang isipin na kailangan pang magkaroon muna ng Habagat, para magkaroon ako ng realization. Anyway, I really benefited from this SWM. Kasi kung hindi ako napirmi sa bahay, malamang, I'm still uncertain, down parin yung emotion ko. :)

God has his own way talaga to let you see the brighter side. Sometimes he uses tragic experience for you to remember that life is beautiful. That He has a bigger plan for you, h'wag mo lang kontrahin kung anong plano nya. Just put down your worries, lay your faith in Him, and He will take charge for everything. at sino naman ako para pumalag dun? I'm just His servant.

Love you Lord! :)

RM to SEM 4

Grabe I feel exhausted na in doing this research. Pero yung pakiramdam na exhausted and somewhat you feel, half fulfilled. Half fulfilled kasi hindi pa naman tapos e, yung tipong alam mong youre getting there and doing the right track. So kahit pagod at masakit na sa mata, go padin. Kasi once naman natapos namin 'to based sa plan, for sure, this is something na I will be proud of naman. Haaaaaaaaaaay! Naalala ko lang bigla yung project ko sa SEM 4, kaya ayun pinanood ko uli. Parang I feel tired na kasi, so I paused for a while and pinanood ko uli sya. I want to find reason kasi why should I go on and overcome this tiring feeling. Althoug dapat lang naman, not mainly because for compliance but, alam mo kasi na eto na yun e, yung moment na babalik balikan mo sa college, na eto yung nahihirapan ka, kumbaga, another obstacles to overcome. Ayun, after watching my project, I found reason and meaning again. Sarap lang! Kahit pressured, ini-enjoy mo parin bawat moment.

God bless me! With God nothing is impossible. He will work on this, definitely He will guide me along the way. I know it. I always does! thought for the day: "If you are confused, tired and exhausted, cannot find any reason why you should go and continue, look back and think of your previous accomplishments."

Mark Caguioa; My Guy, My MVP!

I have always been a Ginebra die hard, since I was a child. Seeing my team winning a game, championship and achieving individual awards makes me proud of them. Today is one of the most happiest part of my life being a Ginebra fan. Seeing Mark Caguioa finally achieved the most prestigious award, a basketball player could ever achieved. Making him the 37th PBA Most Valuable Player. Finally he got the plum, that WE as a fan believed, it was rubbed to him twice. For us, its not his first but actually, his third, if the two were given to him before.

This is such a sweet day for me. So proud of my idol! He really, really deserved it. Haaaaaay! what else to say? But CONGRATULATIONS MARK CAGUIOA! You're the man!

(credit to the owner of this photo)

Mark Caguioa to the Ginebra fans:

"You make me proud to wear Ginebra jersey!"

My Promise

They don't understand. . . .

If one day you wake up and find that you're missing me
And your hearts starts to wonder, where on this earth I could be
Thinking maybe you come back into the place that we meet
You can see me waiting for you on the corner of the street

I'm not moving
I'm not moving. . . . . . .

Matakaw akong tao, halos lahat kinakain ko nga e.

Kahit nga "pride" kinakain ko kung kailangan. It's just so sad na there are times talaga na kung sino pa yung madalas mong kasama, yun talaga yung hindi pala talaga nakakakilala ng tunay na ikaw. Yung tipong they are too afraid to tell you your mistakes, if there is. They will hide it, eventually later on, malalaman mo na lang sa ibang tao. Or, they just pretend ok lahat and nothing is wrong, everything is smooth.

Nakakalungkot lang isipin na I thought they perceive me as transparent, na if they want to tell me something, one text away or msg thru fb and twitter lang ako. Pero hindi, there's a wall among us pala. For them pala, its hard to open up. To tell in front of my face na ganito ako, ganyan ako. They perceived me pala as "di tumatanggap ng mali."

Yung pakiramdam na, you thought "aaaah ok sila sakin, kasi wala naman sila nababanggit." Pero kaya pala wala sinasabi, kasi, totally, as in totally, its the other way around.

Masakit kasi, lagi sa ibang tao ko nalalaman. And one thing, sobrang malapit pa sakin yung mga taong nagrereklamo sakin ng ganun. Sad, kasi whenever I asked them naman, it seems nothing is wrong. Ang bigat lang sa loob.

Kung pwede na lang sana buksan na lang nila yung puso at isip ko para kahit di na ko magsalita, para makita nila yung totoo kong nararamdaman, yung purity and sincerity ng friendship na ino-offer mo sa kanila. Kaso hindi ganun yun e. Sobrang disappointing lang talaga.

Kumakain ako ng pride, tumatanggap ako ng mali, nagso-sorry ako kapag dapat. Sana makita din nila yun. Sana i-try din nila. Siguro nga this time around, I need to change, my approach, my personality, me as friend sa kanila, para somehow mabago naman yung perception nila towards me. Baka siguro ako nga yung may mali. Tsaka baka, ako lang ang nakakaalam na akala ko "transparent" ako. Yung tipong sakin talaga yung diperensya.

Ok sige, ta-try ko paglabas ng bahay namin, pagdating ko sa school. God, walk with me ha? Let's do this together, ikaw lang kasi nakakakita ng laman ng puso ko e. You know very well what's inside.

:'(

"nakakalungkot isipin how people often don't value those things you did for them, all they can see is your errors and faults, which is actually just the cause of what they did."

"I think I need to change my approach, this time. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "

"nakakadisappoint lang."

:(

I am super pampered

The other day, I was not feeling well. I feel like I will be having a colds, and oh yes! The next morning my head is heavy and I can't breath that much because my nose is clogged. Since my brother (the second child) is going to the supermarket to buy stuff in the house. I asked him to buy me tissue that I will be needing for the next consecutive days. I asked him to buy me a roll of two-ply tissue.

When he got home, I look for the tissue immediately. As I opened the plastic bag, I got surprised and touched. He bought me this.

I only asked for a roll, he bought me four rolls! :) And not only that, he even bought a can of Dole Pineapple juice for me to drink so I will recovered faster.

I may not have a sister, but that doesn't make me feel incomplete. Having these two brothers of mine who always steps up to fill the absence of a girl sibling makes my world enough to make others envy of me.

I am super pampered indeed! :)

My Endopsychic Conflict

Dear Jona,

Get a life! Hard headed! Don't you dare help him again, for he is always committing the same mistake over and over again. If he has his problem, you care for him TOO MUCH, as in too much! If he is okay, did he still listen to you? Diba may sarili naman syang decision? Choice nya yun e. Nasasaktan ka lang ng paulit-ulit. Sarili mo na lang ang isipin mo.

-ID


Dear Jona,

Kapag ginawa mo yun, masahol ka pa sa walang kwentang tao! He has chosen you because he know you will always help him and you will understand him always. Kaya ikaw ang pinili nya, he has a lot of friends whom he can tell the whole thing, pero ikaw ang pinili nya sa lahat. Dahil sayo sya may tiwala. Gagawin mo ba yun? Kung nalilito ka na, di you pray to God, gaya ng lagi mong ginagawa.

-SUPEREGO


Dear Jona,

Its true na he trusted you that much, hindi madali yung pinagdaanan nya at alam mo yan. Sayo lang sya sumasandal if he is down. He may commit the same mistake over and over, pero kaya ka nga andyan e. Siguro lang, medyo dumistansya ka muna, let him feel na hindi mo magugustuhan yung gagawin nya if ever. Ganun lang, take it easy, sabi nga ni Maam Ria, "don't be too hard on yourself". Mapapansin at mapapansin naman nya yan e, na you're getting colder and colder, if he asks you, then say so. Pero 'wag kang bumitiw, ok? Pray ka lang. :) Everything will be okay, ganun talaga, genuine kang kaibigan e. Part yan, masasaktan at masasaktan ka, ok lang yan, alam naman ni Lord lahat yan e. Ok? :)

-EGO

Saved by Nognog :D

This week is sooooo tiring! Nevertheless, there still reason to find happiness, kahit mga small things in life lang. Happy! Finally I bought this bag para sa baby lappy ko :) Thanks to my buddy who always catch me when I'm about to fall, haha! I'm short of cash, muntik ko na hindi mabili ang bag, good thing I have an angel beside me earlier. Haaaay, nawala ang pagod ko, nakuha ko na yung gusto ko, na-prove ko pang mahal ako ng buddy ko, ang sweet! 2 in a row, ako na ang Pampered! Ako na ang may Nognog, sweet lang :) bait bait!

Oh, by the way, here's the bag. :)

You & I

You spoke. I listened.
You're afraid. I advised.
You're down. I encouraged.
You asked. I spoke.
You listen. I was heard.
You believed. I was followed.
You felt brave. I'm afraid.
You're down again. I pretend.
You feel worry. I care.

I standby. And I will always. . . . . .

But most of all,

I PRAY.

There are times that you need to take a lot of courage to say what's your true feelings, not only with the person, but on a particular situation. Thoughts that you keep on holding back, emotions that are too painful, and situations that you wish did not happened. Events that keep on hitting the wound you wish to be healed.

Words that are just waiting for proper time and place to be heard. And if these words came out, a heavy chest will soon feel comfortable. A pair of feet that will learn again to take a stand. A heart that will learn to trust anew. And a soul that will once again. . . . . .

be free!

I got these images in the internet. I love those words in it. Simple, yet meaningful!

Forgiven! :)

Haaaaay! God is really good!


Kanina lang, eto ako:

the good news is, my friend accepted my apology! And so now, eto na ko:


Buti na lang! At least, I have my peace of mind bago matulog. Thank You Lord, you touched the heart of Nognog.

The Bad Me :'(

:( napakaplayful ko talaga! bad! bakit ba pati feelings ng kaibigan ko nagawa kong i-good time? ayan tuloy! :( nagi-guilty ako ng sobra :( yung pakiramadam na kahit anong "sorry" ko, not enough, actually the word is "not worthy".

hindi lang kasi once, but twice ko syang gi-nood time, haaaaaaaaaaay! the bad Me strikes! :( and look what I've got? an angry friend, haaaay! yung pakiramdam na dati kapag magte-text sya at name nya mag-a-appear, excited pa ko magbasa, ngayon halos ayoko ko damputin yung cp, kasi for sure message ng isang galit na kaibigan yung mababasa ko. :(

masaklap pa, to my surprise, hindi nya ko inaaway, he just give me a cold treatment, na pinakaayaw ko sa lahat! mabuti pa yung sumbatan na lang ako, hay! pero I had no choice, fault ko e. haaaay! :(

ginawa kong katuwaan ang isang bagay na dapat ako mismo yung extra sensitive na huma-handle :'(

I'M SOOOO STUPID! :(

Kahapon lang uli ako tumawa ng ganon, pag-uwi ko ng bahay noon ko lang narealized. Its been a while since I haven't laugh that loud. Namiss ko tumawa ng ganon. Yun nga lang this time, with different faces, new people and new ideas, also a new me.


Its true, broadening your horizon won't kill you.

:)

Hoarding's Wish

I wish I have the ability to read someone else mind and heart.

I wish I'm playing violin in a crowd.

I wish I can dance in the rain with that special person in my life.

I wish I can see an old friend.

I wish I can stay overnight in a beach, sleep by the seashore with a bonfire on my side.

I wish I can eat ice cream all day long, and never got cough and flu.

I wish I can go to Batanes.

I wish I can fulfill someone else dream.

Quotable Quotes 2

"Hindi nyo makikita sa kilay ko ang galit ko,
pero makikita nyo sa kilay ko ang gutom ko."
-Maam Trisha Gotinga, Psy 8 class, 2011

"When I say "I love you" I mean it."
-Maam Joyce Lardizabal-Padilla, GC class, 2012


"Elementary and high school education is your right,
but college education is a privilege, so make the most out of it."
-Sir Ronan Estoque

"Hindi lahat ng pwede ay tama."
-Sam Mendoza, Personalan April 12,2012 episode

"Don't be too hard on your self."
-Maam Ria Jacela


"There is no Zero learning."
-Maam Marilyn Obod

prayer to lessen my paranoid personality

Dear God,

Napaparanoid po ako, please help Me. :(

Paki-ibsan po yung nararamdaman ko, make me feel relax po. :(

I'm not saying na hindi ko po kayang i-handle kaya ganito yung nararamdaman ko, pero sana po tulungan nyo ko. :(

Ikaw lang po yung may kakayahang makabasa at malaman yung tunay na laman ng puso ko, alam nyo rin po bakit ako nagkakaganito.

Ayoko po ng napaparanoid. :(

Kayo na po bahala sakin. I love You po.


Amen.

Prayer for Health

Dear God,

Sana po mas maayos na yung kalagayan ni Ren ngayon. At kung hindi pa, sana po di na magatagal at makarecover na sya sa lalong madaling panahon, sana din po anuman yung iniinda ni Gelo ngayon sana po wala lang yun. Hope maging mas maayos ang pakiramdam nila, yung physical aspect nila palakasin nyo po. And with this illness na meron sila ngayon, sana maisip nilang tawagan ka. Kayo na po bahala sa dalawa, mahal na mahal ko po sila, sana po wag nyo sila pabayaan.

At salamat din po, kasi malakas ako. Pati narin po ang buong pamilya ko. Thank you kasi lagi ka andyan sa tabi ko, Ramdam na ramdam ko po. I love you Lord.

Ang lahat po sa pangalan ni Jesus.

Amen.

For those Anonymous :)

For all those anonymous who keeps on reading my blog, THANK YOU SO MUCH! I really appreciate it. I know, some of you are in the other part of the world. I want to say thank you for the time browsing and reading my blog. Hope you got something from me. And if you want to say something, everyone is welcome to leave a comment. Or if you guys also have blogs, just paste in the link so I can also browse yours. Im fan of reading blogs, so feel free to post it.

God Bless us all! Take care.

Missing Myself :(

I miss the old me. The person who seemed to be so tough. Yung dating ako, na ako. I can't even recall why I became like this. I know this will end, maybe not sooner, but I know this emotional crisis will end soon. And I'm hoping it will not take that long. I'm tired of being like this, day by day I'm trying my very best not to be like this, but I don't know why, sometimes I ended up so negative. I miss the old me, the person I used to know was so positive, in everything I do, in ever person I communicate with. In every situation when nobody seemed to understand, I will. But why I am like this lately, I think in an irrational manner. I act in a way strange to my friends. I do things i supposed not to do. I miss the old person in me. And want that old persona back.

But how? When everybody seemed to misunderstood the things I'm doing, they think I'm having tantrums or just having a bad day. How? If they don't even bother to ask, actually they do. Its just, I lost the old me. Where can I find the missing Me? I know I'm just here, maybe I just need time to heal myself, from what? I don't know. All I know is I need to be heal, and I want the old Me to be back.

Can you please comeback as soon as you can? Can you please make it fast? I terribly myself, can you make it tomorrow? Can you please comeback so I can fix myself? I miss myself, and you know that, I miss you JONA, please don't make it longer? Comeback, because I'm starting to be a stranger to my own self. Comeback now please?

For me?

Grrrrr! Why I can't get you out of my mind?

"Sana puzzle na lang kayo,
para pwede kong ibalik sa dati ang lahat."

Story of the Wounded Child

One day, a girl invested care, love and attention to her so called extended family, her comfort zone. Everyday seemed so magical. Their day starts and ends with laughter and affection for one another. But just like any other relationship, for you to know if its solid already it has to be tested. An event that seemed ordinary broke the magical feelings for each and everyone. The lady invested too much love for her extended family begun to questioned their love towards her. She started asking herself, "did I became too much?" "did they really appreciate my concern? Or for them its just an option?"

When the time the girl wants to express her thoughts, there is no one available to listen. But the Lord sees her heart breaking, so in her despair, the Lord sent her an angel, in disguise. An angel in a form of a Hurt Child.

The Hurt Child said, "don't worry now, the Hurt Child is here to help the Wounded Child." Immediately, the Hurt Child comforted the girl and told to be strong . To smile and laugh despite of the pain. To try new things, like getting out from her comfort zone. For her to see the other side of the world, because the Hurt Child once experienced the same situation. The girl saw the beauty and sincerity of Hurt Child's words. And then on, a Wounded Child was born.

One day, she was decided to follow and try the Hurt Child's advice. Afraid that she might hurt and be hurt by her decision, the wounded child slowly stepped out of her comfort zone. And she saw the other people smiling at her, some told stories with her. And after the conversation they told her, "we dont get the chance to talk to you like this because you're always with your buddies." She even saw a person badly needs someones help at that day. Without any second thought, she immediately help. After doing so, the person says "thank you, love you dude!" The wounded child smiled. And then realized, I thought I already saw the beautiful side of the world because I'm in my comfort zone. But God is really mysterious and loving. He let me see the more beautiful version of the world. The side in which a lot of people are just waiting for her to notice them, and be given a chance to know them.

At the end of the day, the wounded child whisper a prayer to the Lord. She said, "Thank you very much, you always surprise me! You hide beautiful things and people with an unseemly start. Now I finally know realized the beauty of seeing the other side of the world. Thank you for using the Hurt Child, for me to be able to stepped out of my comfort zone and broaden my horizon. And now that I have stepped out, please guide me, and make me wise in making decisions, please show me those beautiful people that I should be spending my limited time in this world. I love You Lord. If you're with me, for sure I will be strong."

As she tries to live each day, she always remember that the Hurt Child told her, "smile lang. tawa lang."

Moral lesson, If you are being ignored, feel like family or friends are not appreciating what you do, you have alternatives. Be not afraid to get out from your comfort zone, someone else might be needing your help aside from the world you are in now, just waiting for you to notice them. People who might appreciate you and might be willing to show how worthy you are.

Just don't forget to, SMILE. LAUGH!Just like the Hurt Child & Wounded Child did.

:)
:D

Disappointing. . . . . . .

TRUE

I won't talk, I won't breathe
I won't move 'till you finally see
That you belong with me
You might think I don't look
But deep inside the corner of my mind
I'm attached to you,

I'm weak, it's true
'Cause I'm afraid to know the answer
Do you want me too?
'Cause my heart keeps falling faster

I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing that's true
So I will not hide it's time to try
Anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

You don't know what you do
Every time you walk into the room
I'm afraid to move
I'm weak, it's true
I'm just scared to know the ending
Do you see me too?
Do you even know you met me?

I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing that's true
So I will not hide, it's time to try
Anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

I know when I go I'll be on my way to you
The way that's true

I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing that's true
So I will not hide, it's time to try
Anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

Labo!

-When I said "I'm okay!" lalo namang umalalay, when I pretend to be tough and everything is alright, he insist! Hmp! Gara!

-Did he noticed kaya? If so, why he bothered to do it? Pwede naman follow what's the situation calls for.

-and besides, I remember I Corinthians 13:4

-Magulo ka talaga! And with what You did? You just made things uncertain, ano ba talaga?

My Natal Day!

I am hoping to have a meaningful day. We have a long quiz sa Sem 2, a good score will be a good gift, a gift to myself, sana si Temporal lobe gumana, para di mahirapan si Frontal lobe. And of course, I'm waiting for Him to say the words. Hoping but not expecting, sana makarating sa thoughts nya, ita-try kong ipasa through Telepathy. Haha!

Birthday wishes:

1) Ren's fast recovery
2) For him to remember me, if not, a substitute will be much appreciated, yung tipong magsasabi ng "Im on my way". Para I'm broken angel no more.
3) Family stability

That's all.

:)